Where there’s friendship, but no friends

Keenan looked around at the directors. They all seemed friendly enough, with the exception of Haruko. The problem – if you could call it that – was that he couldn’t see them as anything other than his superiors. They weren’t his superiors anymore, but they had been for so long.

He sighed and shook the thoughts away. He missed working with Bertram. Things had been so much easier when he’d first become an agent. Now, he was the High Commander. Everyone looked to him to lead them.

“Shall we begin?” Keenan said, glancing around at the assembled group. There were scattered nods and Keenan opened his folder. There was work to be done. He could worry about making friends another time.

It’s Finally Friday

Matthew watched the group of agents critically. He knew they were agents because he recognized them from work. However, they were hardly acting like professionals. Not only were they loud and drunk, they were rowdy.

Two of them were dancing on the tabletops, much to the delight of their companions. The bartender looked less pleased. Matthew beckoned him over.

“Have you considered cutting them off?” he asked.

Chris laughed. “I did that already. Might be a case of too little, too late,” he said. He looked over at the group and shook his head. “It’s like this every week with them. I figure, so long as they aren’t destructive… it’s better than what they could be doing.”

For a moment, Matthew wondered what he could mean. Then, he remembered some of the rowdy times he’d had with his brother. He chuckled softly and nodded. “I see what you mean,” he said.

“If they’re bothering you, I could ask them to quiet down,” Chris said. Matthew shook his head and waved him away. Maybe they needed to blow off some steam. If that was the case, he wasn’t going to spoil their fun.

Wasting Time

Matthew frowned at the image on the screen. His eyes darted over it, searching for the objects listed at the bottom. He began clicking, sliding the little pointer around the screen. Soon, he’d found all twelve of the hidden objects. He glanced at the clock and shrugged. He clicked on the button to have another round.

“What are you doing?” Haruko asked, glaring at him.

A frown touched Matthew’s lips and he looked up from the screen. “I finished my work,” he said, shrugging. “Emrys won’t be here for another twenty minutes. I’m killing time.”

Haruko shook his head and left the other director to his game. Some people had better things to do with their time.

for tomorrow we say farewell

“We’re leaving tomorrow,” Matthew whispered. His gaze flicked to Emrys. “You sure about this?”

Emrys hugged him gently and nodded. “I’m sure,” he said. “If you’re happy, then I’m happy and… this will make you happy. We both know that.”

Matthew didn’t nod, although he wanted to. Instead, he snuggled closer to Emrys. “We should get to sleep,” he said. “We’ve got a big day tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow, we say goodbye to this place forever,” Emrys murmured.

Matthew glanced at him and blinked. Emrys… was smiling. Sighing softly, Matthew nuzzled against him. Perhaps they would be all right after all.

that stupid four-eyes

Keenan stifled laughter as he listened to Haruko grumble and gripe in the next room. He’d known when he created Matthew Sherwood as the new Field Director for the Agency that sparks would fly between the two men.

Earnest was a sweet guy, which meant that Haruko had walked all over him. Having Matthew as the buffer between them now was just what Keenan needed to keep the man in check.

Bertram’s brows twitched when Haruko’s complaints got loud enough that he heard them as well. He adjusted his glasses and looked at Keenan. “Does he have a problem with glasses?” he asked, bristling.

“Only on Matthew,” Keenan said. He chuckled and held up a finger. “Wait for it!”

“Director Haruko,” a soft, pleasant voice said from the other room. “I’ll thank you not to call me stupid when you think I can’t hear you.”

As Haruko growled, Keenan burst out laughing. “It’s past time Haruko had to deal with someone that would put him in his place,” he said, giving Bertram a malicious grin.

“While I agree,” Bertram said, hiding a smirk, “the cackle of glee was probably an uncalled for and inappropriate response.”

“As if I care,” Keenan replied, shaking his head.

if we cannot see

“Are you sure about this?” Matthew said. He cupped Emrys’s cheeks and looked into his eyes. Emrys just smiled at him. He seemed so confident. How could he be so self-assured about this?

Emrys took his hand and kissed them. “I’ve thought about this for a long time, Matthew,” he said, his voice soft. He shook his head. “I don’t see any other options. I know you can’t be truly happy separated from your brother. I know I can’t be truly happy separated from you…”

“But, what about your brother?” Matthew whispered.

Shaking his head, Emrys said, “I can be happy with merely writing to him – calling him. You’re so much closer to your brother than I am to Tristan.” A wistful smile touched his lips and he added, “Besides, I think Tristan needs his space now.”

Matthew chewed his lip for a moment. He blinked when Emrys touched his chin.

As their eyes met again, Emrys asked, “If we can’t see any other option, then, what else can we do?” He kissed Matthew on the cheek. “This is right, little bird. It’s right for both of us.”

inevitability

Matthew could tell what Emrys was planning. The moment he’d finally verbalized the matter that had been weighing so heavily on his thoughts, Matthew knew that things would come to a head.

He was sitting in their room, staring down at the courtyard, when it happened. It started off as a simple conversation between Emrys and his brother. Now, it was a heated argument. Their words floated up to Matthew’s ears and he frowned.

“You’re not thinking straight,” Tristan accused. “He’s nothing! And you’d give up all that you have here for him?”

Emrys stared at Tristan for a moment. Then, he shook his head and said something that Matthew couldn’t hear. Shoving Tristan out of the way, Emrys ran back inside their house. Matthew sighed and slipped out of the window seat. He knew what Emrys was planning. Part of him wanted it, but he was worried. Could Emrys be happy on Shynia?

Only a mighty sadness fills

Emrys had been thinking about Matthew for a while. He was content, he said. However, Emrys wanted him to be more than content. Emrys wanted him to be happy. He’d been trying to decide how he could do that. What could he do for Matthew that would allow the young man to be happy, without losing his own source of joy?

Now, as Matthew rubbed his shoulders, he was still considering the matter. He still hadn’t found the answer.

“You’re so quiet,” Matthew said, his voice soft.

Sighing, Emrys covered one of Matthew’s hands with his own. “I’m thinking,” he said, his voice soft. “You… want to go home. You can’t ever be happy here – not really.”

Matthew’s voice was barely audible as he said, “You… want for me to be happy?”

Emrys nodded. “But… I can’t let you go,” he admitted. He looked over his shoulder at Matthew and added, “If I did that, then I’d be the one that was unhappy.”

Some work from sun to sun…

The door chimed. Matthew groaned. He rolled over and looked at the time. It was two o’clock in the morning! He’d gotten an hour of sleep. “Coming,” he called, barely keeping the frustration out of his voice.

The door opened to reveal the captain. Kit was holding his son, who was crying. He grimaced. “He fell out of bed,” he said. He sighed. “Could you…” he trailed off. “Sorry for waking you, but, from the way he was crying…”

Parents and doctors had no time to sleep, it seemed. “Did you bump your head, Isaac?” Matthew said, his tone gentle.

It’s just living by your own rules

Since aiding in his brother’s escape, Matthew had been on his best behavior. At first, he’d had no choice in the matter. Now, though, he had relaxed. His brother was safely away from Tristan. He could handle being under Emrys’s control. They’d settled into a comfortable balance. So long as he obeyed the commands Emrys gave him, he lived in relative peace.

He was leaned back against Emrys, now, as they stared out at the setting sun. Emrys smoothed his hair gently. It was longer now that Matthew was comfortable with, but Emrys seemed to like it. “I still can’t figure you out,” Emrys murmured into his ear. “You fought to help your brother get free and now… you seem content to remain with me. Don’t you long to be free?”

“I’m as free here as I ever was at home,” Matthew said, shrugging. No matter where he’d lived, he’d had to live by someone else’s rules. It was just a matter of whose rules it was. At home, it had been the Agency’s rules. Here, it was Emrys who made the rules. The only way he’d ever truly be free would be if he could make his own decisions.

He tilted his head thoughtfully. “You don’t abuse me or force me to do things I don’t wish to do. I have… everything I need. I miss my home, but… content is the word for it.”

“How could I make you happy?” Emrys breathed. He kissed Matthew’s hair gently and said, “What would it take to make you happy, rather than simply content?”

“I honestly don’t know,” Matthew said. He chuckled and shook his head. “It was simple for Andrew. He didn’t just miss our home – he had this need to go back there. I… I miss Andrew. I think, if I could still have in my life, I’d be happy.” He looked over his shoulder and added, “Andy would be miserable, though. So, I’ll settle for content.”

Emrys frowned at him for a moment. Then, he nodded. “Fair enough,” he said, his voice soft. However, there was something in Emrys’s expression, a sort of thoughtfulness that Matthew couldn’t quite figure out.

Frowning slightly, Matthew turned away and settled his head on Emrys’s chest. He couldn’t help wondering what that expression might mean. Just what was Emrys plotting now?

Previous Older Entries

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.